I am glad that we are not taking this to a personal level. I want to offer an alternative view on the idea of a modpack developer, in hopes that we can find even ground. I can't change your opinion of modpacks, but I can offer you some facts.
I can't speak on behalf of the RU server, but for the NA and EU servers, especially when it comes to modpacks, this statement is not true. Many larger modpacks, (specifically ones that allow for selection), are based on features, not developers. Here's an example from my modpack:
Take note, that users can select different developers. Let's say, for example, PROTanki no longer allowed me to host his mod. OK, people move to the version by OldSkool. They don't go the PROtanki's website to download his version. This contradicts the idea of a modpack - "a collection of mods that can be quickley downloaded and installed together". Users of modpacks use them to literally not have to download from the developer's site. Here is another example that does not have to do with modpacks.
(If you want more examples, i can probably find a few more)
I am surprised that you would not want your mod hosted in a modpack. A modpack, for a developer, is a form of "earned media".
Think of it like "free promotions". A modpack is like a videogame label or distributor, like EA or Steam. By having your mod in a modpack, you are getting free exposure to tens of thousands of users that would else have not heard about your mod. Is this what you think of when you accuse modpacks of "stealing your fame?" (I am asking it in a genuine way, not to be rude).
Again, I can't speak for all modpackers, but we don't do it for the fame, and certainly not for the money. We do it for the benefit of the community. I took over OMC and founded it on the idea of making mods available to all users who:
A) - are not computer smart and can't install mods easily
B) - do not want to spend hours and hours finding mods and trying to install and configure them "just right"
Hosting a modpack is expensive, over 100+ USD a year. We have to pay for keeping a domain, pay for a file hosting server, pay for licensing of the server control panel software, and for SSL and code signing certificates. That's not including other miscellaneous expenses. And that's in money alone, not including the hundreds of hours that myself and my team put into maintaining the database and fixing bugs. In doing this with only having donations from users, it is simply not profitable. I don't do this as a job, but as a hobby.
I personally have always though of modpacks and mod devs to have the agreement of "I the modpacker give you more users, and a link in the modpack that users can click to read more or donate. In exchange, you the developer allow me to host your mod, and you will keep it free of malware and ads."
But, if you are trying to develop your mods "for profit", then I can 100% understand that you would be upset, and consider us to be "stealing your revenue". (But as a side note, this is a very small group of developers, most agree with the above).
In summary, running a modpack is not a profitable business model. I don't do it for money. I do it because I want to, and I find it fun. It is a benefit for the community and give you, the developer, lots of exposure to new users. If you don't agree with this, then I'm sorry because I assumed you would see it as most other developers on the NA and EU servers.
If you would like to bring another point to this discussion, then please do, I would love to hear it :)